1 00:00:23,960 --> 00:00:26,080 - How ya goin'? - Hi. 2 00:00:27,080 --> 00:00:28,639 Had a good night? 3 00:00:28,640 --> 00:00:29,999 Yep. 4 00:00:30,000 --> 00:00:31,679 - You goin' out, or...? - What? 5 00:00:31,680 --> 00:00:33,199 What can I get ya? 6 00:00:33,200 --> 00:00:34,639 What? 7 00:00:34,640 --> 00:00:36,919 You buying? Yeah? 8 00:00:36,920 --> 00:00:38,239 S-sorry? 9 00:00:38,240 --> 00:00:40,759 You buying? Yeah? 10 00:00:40,760 --> 00:00:42,239 Drugs? No! 11 00:00:42,240 --> 00:00:43,920 Okay, if you're not buying, get off my spot. 12 00:00:45,360 --> 00:00:49,999 So... oh, sorry, I would but, um, I've just got her to sleep, so... 13 00:00:50,000 --> 00:00:51,839 - Oh. - She's a really light sleeper. 14 00:00:51,840 --> 00:00:53,239 If I turn on the engine, she'll wake up. 15 00:00:53,240 --> 00:00:55,839 Oh, right. Not my problem. Skitch 'em! Skitch 'em! 16 00:00:55,840 --> 00:00:58,279 - Why can't you just...? - Why can't I just? 17 00:00:58,280 --> 00:01:00,000 - Why can't you just?! - Shh! 18 00:01:02,160 --> 00:01:03,999 Oh, fine. What, um... 19 00:01:04,000 --> 00:01:05,479 - All right, I'll buy something. - Okay. 20 00:01:05,480 --> 00:01:06,999 What do... uh, what's your cheapest drug? 21 00:01:07,000 --> 00:01:08,116 Fitty. 22 00:01:09,280 --> 00:01:10,959 - Oh. What is it? - Shard. 23 00:01:10,960 --> 00:01:12,719 It's the good stuff. 24 00:01:12,720 --> 00:01:14,999 - Is that ice? - Yeah. 25 00:01:15,000 --> 00:01:16,719 Jeez, I don't want ice! 26 00:01:16,720 --> 00:01:18,879 - No? - There's an epidemic! 27 00:01:18,880 --> 00:01:20,479 - Yeah. - Did you see Four Corners? 28 00:01:20,480 --> 00:01:21,480 Oh, my God! 29 00:01:21,481 --> 00:01:25,199 There was a guy in emergency masturbating for 18 hours. 30 00:01:25,200 --> 00:01:26,919 Had to put him in an isolation cubicle. 31 00:01:26,920 --> 00:01:28,679 - Okay, move your car. - Shh! 32 00:01:28,680 --> 00:01:31,679 What else have you got? Have you got, oh, I don't know, coke? 33 00:01:31,680 --> 00:01:33,399 - I remember that. - Four hungy. 34 00:01:33,400 --> 00:01:34,919 Jesus Chr...! When did that happen? 35 00:01:34,920 --> 00:01:36,399 Hey? Move your car! Move it, baby! 36 00:01:36,400 --> 00:01:37,400 - Shhh! - Time to go! 37 00:01:37,401 --> 00:01:39,999 - Yep! - Stop it. Can you just...? Just... 38 00:01:40,000 --> 00:01:42,319 Can you just roll, like, roll me over... 39 00:01:42,320 --> 00:01:43,679 - Can you just roll me over there? - Hey? 40 00:01:43,680 --> 00:01:45,200 - Roll me over there. - Yep, twenty. 41 00:01:46,240 --> 00:01:48,360 - For a push? - Yep. Come on. 42 00:01:50,680 --> 00:01:52,360 All right. All right, all right, all right! 43 00:01:59,949 --> 00:02:05,432 Synced and corrected by kinglouisxx www.addic7ed.com 44 00:02:09,440 --> 00:02:11,479 Well, it's been 12 weeks. 45 00:02:11,480 --> 00:02:13,319 Here you are. 46 00:02:13,320 --> 00:02:14,800 Novelty worn off? 47 00:02:17,720 --> 00:02:20,879 The choices that you make now really matter. 48 00:02:20,880 --> 00:02:22,360 Oh, fuck! 49 00:02:23,760 --> 00:02:25,479 Shh, shh, shh. 50 00:02:25,480 --> 00:02:27,360 You're not number one anymore. 51 00:02:28,560 --> 00:02:31,119 And there's no point whinging about what you've lost. 52 00:02:31,120 --> 00:02:33,519 Do you think if I have the kale and the spinach...? 53 00:02:33,520 --> 00:02:36,079 Muscle tone. Sleep. Your freedom. 54 00:02:36,080 --> 00:02:38,479 Decaf and a double shot latte for you. 55 00:02:38,480 --> 00:02:41,160 Oh, what I wouldn't give for a real coffee! 56 00:02:42,160 --> 00:02:43,919 Obviously not breastfeeding, then? 57 00:02:43,920 --> 00:02:45,879 No, it didn't work out. 58 00:02:45,880 --> 00:02:48,000 Let's look instead at what you've gained. 59 00:02:50,120 --> 00:02:54,520 Rounder bottoms. Stretch marks. Adult acne. Haemorrhoids. 60 00:02:55,520 --> 00:02:56,520 Shit! 61 00:02:56,521 --> 00:02:59,240 And a small, helpless child. 62 00:03:00,240 --> 00:03:01,720 This is motherhood. 63 00:03:02,720 --> 00:03:04,360 You're all in this together. 64 00:03:05,920 --> 00:03:07,999 No, prams can stay outside the building. 65 00:03:08,000 --> 00:03:09,679 Oh, it's okay, I think I've got it. 66 00:03:09,680 --> 00:03:13,680 Prams... can stay... outside the building... please. 67 00:03:16,160 --> 00:03:17,999 Audrey, is it? 68 00:03:18,000 --> 00:03:22,000 You're late. Welcome to mo... parents' group. 69 00:03:23,480 --> 00:03:25,920 We'll just wait for her. 70 00:03:27,800 --> 00:03:30,079 I just knew that this one was in a hurry. 71 00:03:30,080 --> 00:03:32,480 So I got into the perfect position, of course. 72 00:03:33,600 --> 00:03:35,399 Go get Dad, darlin'! 73 00:03:35,400 --> 00:03:37,039 Aisle 17! 74 00:03:37,040 --> 00:03:39,039 And, um, here she is! 75 00:03:39,040 --> 00:03:41,039 Princess Kate! 76 00:03:41,040 --> 00:03:43,199 Neil has a hopeless obsession with the duchess. 77 00:03:43,200 --> 00:03:45,079 - Do you know...? - Ah, thank you, Barbara. Next. 78 00:03:45,080 --> 00:03:47,039 Ah, hello. Mrs Sophie Frances-Cohen. 79 00:03:47,040 --> 00:03:49,879 Sorry! I still get a buzz saying that. 80 00:03:49,880 --> 00:03:54,079 Um, I had the most beautiful room at the Royal Women's Private. 81 00:03:54,080 --> 00:03:58,319 My OB said it was a textbook birth in the end 82 00:03:58,320 --> 00:04:00,239 and this is Eugenia Cohen. 83 00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:02,319 Ester! Ester, who's that? 84 00:04:02,320 --> 00:04:04,039 This is my husband, Ruben. 85 00:04:04,040 --> 00:04:05,599 - Hey, gang! - Hello, Ruben. 86 00:04:05,600 --> 00:04:07,199 This one's got a bit of a throat tickle, 87 00:04:07,200 --> 00:04:09,519 so I thought it best to stay away. 88 00:04:09,520 --> 00:04:12,015 Uh... next? 89 00:04:12,268 --> 00:04:14,799 Ooh! Hi! 90 00:04:14,800 --> 00:04:16,799 I'm Martha. 91 00:04:16,800 --> 00:04:18,391 Oh, and this is Teddy. 92 00:04:18,481 --> 00:04:20,120 It's, uh, Theodore. 93 00:04:20,280 --> 00:04:25,479 Uh, well, mine definitely wasn't textbook. 94 00:04:25,480 --> 00:04:29,079 Posterior, 36-hour delivery, 95 00:04:29,080 --> 00:04:31,599 forceps, ventouse, 96 00:04:31,600 --> 00:04:33,839 fourth-degree tear. 97 00:04:33,840 --> 00:04:36,746 And I'm that one in 200... 98 00:04:38,440 --> 00:04:41,239 The epidural pierced my spinal fluid. 99 00:04:42,241 --> 00:04:44,879 No, no, no, but it... it's all fixed now. 100 00:04:44,880 --> 00:04:46,919 Remarkable healing powers, the anus. 101 00:04:46,920 --> 00:04:49,479 How's the fissure? Any further tearing? 102 00:04:49,480 --> 00:04:52,239 No. All good now, thank you. 103 00:04:52,240 --> 00:04:53,999 We've actually found some, uh, like, 104 00:04:54,000 --> 00:04:57,999 a natural laxative and some soft toilet paper really help with, uh, 105 00:04:58,000 --> 00:04:59,599 Ester's haemorrhoids. 106 00:04:59,600 --> 00:05:01,079 Audrey. 107 00:05:01,080 --> 00:05:02,879 Haemorrhoids? Well, ugh. 108 00:05:02,880 --> 00:05:04,719 Your story. 109 00:05:04,720 --> 00:05:11,519 Sorry. Um, hi, I'm Audrey and this is Stevie, um, named after my dad. 110 00:05:11,520 --> 00:05:13,359 Oh, he's so sweet! 111 00:05:13,360 --> 00:05:14,959 It's a girl. It's a she. 112 00:05:14,960 --> 00:05:16,160 Named Stephen? 113 00:05:16,161 --> 00:05:18,799 - Just Stevie. - Like Stevie Nicks! Brilliant! 114 00:05:18,800 --> 00:05:20,319 Your birth? 115 00:05:20,320 --> 00:05:22,679 Oh, sorry, that, uh, fine, thank you. 116 00:05:22,680 --> 00:05:24,320 Audrey, we're here to share. 117 00:05:25,320 --> 00:05:26,640 C-section, in the end. 118 00:05:27,669 --> 00:05:29,799 Uh, not too posh to push. 119 00:05:29,800 --> 00:05:31,480 I didn't... I didn't elect it. 120 00:05:32,480 --> 00:05:34,039 And, uh, Ester? 121 00:05:34,040 --> 00:05:36,919 Oh, Ester was simply magnificent. 122 00:05:36,920 --> 00:05:38,239 She was so calm. 123 00:05:39,720 --> 00:05:42,559 - Shh. - Yes, Ester? 124 00:05:42,560 --> 00:05:44,479 What's the wi-fi password? 125 00:05:44,480 --> 00:05:46,148 Ah, that's actually just for staff. 126 00:05:46,173 --> 00:05:47,799 - Is it? - Yes. 127 00:05:47,800 --> 00:05:49,319 What's the wi-fi password? 128 00:05:49,320 --> 00:05:51,639 Let's see. Name, Ava Rose. 129 00:05:51,640 --> 00:05:56,879 No story. I, uh, consulted a names book and that's the name I decided. 130 00:05:56,880 --> 00:05:59,959 Uh, birth, C-section. 131 00:05:59,960 --> 00:06:04,079 I did elect, and it ran like clockwork. 132 00:06:04,080 --> 00:06:05,759 Sorry, Ester, I didn't mean to... 133 00:06:05,760 --> 00:06:08,400 Nah, I'm pro-choice. 134 00:06:09,880 --> 00:06:11,359 Abortions, too. 135 00:06:11,360 --> 00:06:14,719 But I... I just didn't get to choose the caesarean. 136 00:06:14,720 --> 00:06:17,199 Not the abortion, obviously. 137 00:06:17,200 --> 00:06:19,439 Choosing a caesarean doesn't make it right. 138 00:06:19,440 --> 00:06:20,959 I thought we agreed on no judgements. 139 00:06:20,960 --> 00:06:22,200 Yeah. Audrey. 140 00:06:23,840 --> 00:06:26,119 Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't... 141 00:06:26,120 --> 00:06:29,839 Just in my experience, the chaos of surgery was... awful. 142 00:06:29,840 --> 00:06:32,719 - As opposed to...? - God, no. That's horrific! 143 00:06:32,720 --> 00:06:34,479 Shit, sorry, Marta. 144 00:06:34,480 --> 00:06:37,239 - Martha. - Martha. Brain's still asleep. 145 00:06:37,240 --> 00:06:41,040 What's not necessary is mothers judging other mothers. 146 00:06:43,160 --> 00:06:45,759 Okay. Sorry. 147 00:06:45,760 --> 00:06:47,399 Thank you. 148 00:06:47,400 --> 00:06:49,719 And, lastly, Jenna. Your little boy's name? 149 00:06:49,720 --> 00:06:54,879 Oh, we... we don't believe in branding or defining his/her gender. 150 00:06:54,880 --> 00:06:57,999 We'll wait for him/her to reveal his/her name. 151 00:06:58,000 --> 00:07:00,639 The Department of Human Services will reveal it in two months, 152 00:07:00,640 --> 00:07:02,119 so you might want to hurry along. 153 00:07:02,120 --> 00:07:03,839 You might get something shit like Rupert. 154 00:07:03,840 --> 00:07:05,199 - Or Stewart. - Or Neil! 155 00:07:05,200 --> 00:07:06,559 That's my husband's name! 156 00:07:06,560 --> 00:07:07,799 Yes, it is. Sorry. 157 00:07:07,800 --> 00:07:11,479 Um, and Herb and I were consciously aware 158 00:07:11,480 --> 00:07:15,359 of making that transition from womb to world 159 00:07:15,360 --> 00:07:18,279 as graceful and peaceful as possible. 160 00:07:18,280 --> 00:07:20,399 Oh, dear. 161 00:07:20,400 --> 00:07:22,279 Pass me the strainer. 162 00:07:22,280 --> 00:07:25,000 Another poo? 163 00:07:25,952 --> 00:07:28,551 Audrey, no. No, no, no, no, no! 164 00:07:28,600 --> 00:07:30,599 She needs the whole areola. 165 00:07:30,600 --> 00:07:33,119 - Pull her off. Let's start again. - It's okay, I know how to do it. 166 00:07:33,120 --> 00:07:35,679 She's just being a bit, um... a bit... 167 00:07:35,680 --> 00:07:39,239 Look, here is a breast that should have been drained hours ago. 168 00:07:39,240 --> 00:07:45,239 Just imagine, Audrey, trying to suck the milk from a coconut! 169 00:07:45,240 --> 00:07:47,559 Oh, she does look hungry! Is that a hungry face? 170 00:07:47,560 --> 00:07:51,479 You know, when I'm engorged, I just have a 2-minute pump. 171 00:07:51,480 --> 00:07:52,999 I don't actually express. 172 00:07:53,000 --> 00:07:55,959 Then how do you know that she's getting her 60ml with each feed? 173 00:07:55,960 --> 00:07:58,399 Oh, you must be exhausted, darling. You've never done the pump and dump? 174 00:07:58,400 --> 00:07:59,400 The what? 175 00:07:59,401 --> 00:08:01,599 If you drink alcohol, some women pump and dump, 176 00:08:01,600 --> 00:08:03,079 dispose of the milk. 177 00:08:03,080 --> 00:08:05,639 Or what's done in my house, pump the milk, dump the baby. 178 00:08:05,640 --> 00:08:07,559 Maybe she chooses not to express. 179 00:08:07,560 --> 00:08:11,079 Wow, what a luxury. Try looking after a baby and 20 staff. 180 00:08:11,080 --> 00:08:13,079 - Was that a judgement? - Maybe she doesn't have a pump. 181 00:08:13,080 --> 00:08:15,399 I've got several. I'd happily lend you a pump. 182 00:08:15,400 --> 00:08:17,039 You don't need pumps, though, girls. 183 00:08:17,040 --> 00:08:19,519 I mean, there's nothing wrong with the manual option, okay? 184 00:08:19,520 --> 00:08:21,439 - Don't touch my boob! - Barbara! 185 00:08:21,440 --> 00:08:24,999 This is just... this is... well, it's unhygienic for one. 186 00:08:25,000 --> 00:08:27,919 Look, I, um, I'm actually doing really well. 187 00:08:27,920 --> 00:08:32,119 I've got a great support team so I... I'm okay. 188 00:08:32,120 --> 00:08:35,879 I don't really think I need, um, this sort of thing, 189 00:08:35,880 --> 00:08:41,199 so I might just go now, if that's okay, thank you. 190 00:08:41,200 --> 00:08:42,679 We'll see you next week! 191 00:08:42,680 --> 00:08:44,720 - She won't be coming back. - There's always one. 192 00:08:47,120 --> 00:08:50,039 Thank you. And, yes, I am fucking exhausted. 193 00:08:50,040 --> 00:08:51,600 La-la-la-la-la! 194 00:09:05,880 --> 00:09:08,399 Hi! Daddy's home! 195 00:09:08,400 --> 00:09:10,159 Hi! You're back. 196 00:09:10,160 --> 00:09:13,959 - How's my baby? - Oh, a bit shit, actually. 197 00:09:13,960 --> 00:09:16,399 I went to that mother's group thing this morning and... 198 00:09:16,400 --> 00:09:18,279 - Oh, you meant Stevie? - No. 199 00:09:18,280 --> 00:09:20,959 Um, you're both my babies. 200 00:09:20,960 --> 00:09:22,799 Did you make some new friends? 201 00:09:22,800 --> 00:09:25,919 Friends? Why would I need new... Yes, I'm wearing my pyjama pants. 202 00:09:25,920 --> 00:09:27,319 Why are you home? 203 00:09:27,320 --> 00:09:29,239 I've got to go down to the Melbourne office this arvo. 204 00:09:29,240 --> 00:09:30,240 What? 205 00:09:30,241 --> 00:09:31,719 The canyon tender's gone to shit 206 00:09:31,720 --> 00:09:33,271 and they want me to go down and dazzle them. 207 00:09:33,296 --> 00:09:35,935 You can't. I've got Em's birthday tonight. 208 00:09:35,960 --> 00:09:38,799 Oh, fuck it, that's right. I'm supposed to be babysitting. 209 00:09:38,800 --> 00:09:40,239 It's not babysitting when it's your... 210 00:09:40,240 --> 00:09:42,239 - When it's your own child. Yeah. - Tell Mandy you can't go. 211 00:09:42,240 --> 00:09:43,559 You've got a new baby. 212 00:09:43,560 --> 00:09:45,479 Oh, well, that's Mandy, who wanted to have a Skype meeting 213 00:09:45,480 --> 00:09:46,959 when you were in active labour. 214 00:09:46,960 --> 00:09:48,120 Which you did. 215 00:09:48,121 --> 00:09:49,559 Yeah, to tell her I couldn't take the call. 216 00:09:49,560 --> 00:09:51,039 Yeah, that took a long time. 217 00:09:51,040 --> 00:09:52,519 Look, it was hard for her to hear. 218 00:09:52,520 --> 00:09:56,080 You know, I... I feel like I have apologised for that a lot, Aud. 219 00:09:57,470 --> 00:10:00,359 - I know it's a shitty time. - I haven't been out since she was born. 220 00:10:00,360 --> 00:10:02,279 I know. I know. 221 00:10:02,280 --> 00:10:03,760 You know what? 222 00:10:04,760 --> 00:10:05,822 We should ask Verity. 223 00:10:05,931 --> 00:10:07,519 It's about time your mum did something. 224 00:10:07,520 --> 00:10:09,519 Now, that's Mandy. 225 00:10:09,520 --> 00:10:11,119 I will make it up to you, I promise. 226 00:10:11,120 --> 00:10:13,120 I love you. I love you too. 227 00:10:15,200 --> 00:10:16,920 Oh, that iron's on. 228 00:10:19,520 --> 00:10:22,359 Fuck! S... sorry, darling. 229 00:10:22,360 --> 00:10:24,160 Sorry. 230 00:10:28,840 --> 00:10:30,719 So, can you babysit, please? 231 00:10:30,720 --> 00:10:32,799 Mmm. Mmm. 232 00:10:32,800 --> 00:10:35,039 Audrey, darling, you're looking dreadful. 233 00:10:35,040 --> 00:10:37,719 - Thank you. - Now, did you call Dr Fulton? 234 00:10:37,720 --> 00:10:40,879 I'm not depressed. It's called sleep deprivation. 235 00:10:40,880 --> 00:10:43,279 I mean, you haven't been much fun lately. 236 00:10:43,280 --> 00:10:44,919 Which is why I'd like to go tonight. 237 00:10:44,920 --> 00:10:47,519 Hmm. Well, it's very last-minute. 238 00:10:47,520 --> 00:10:51,199 It's Em's birthday. Can you please, please look after Stevie? 239 00:10:51,200 --> 00:10:52,959 No, it's too soon. 240 00:10:52,960 --> 00:10:55,559 - She'll be fine, Mum. - No, it's not her. It's not her. 241 00:10:55,560 --> 00:10:57,199 And I've told you that she's 242 00:10:57,200 --> 00:10:59,439 the spitting image of your father. Nothing like Dad. 243 00:10:59,440 --> 00:11:00,919 And with the anniversary coming up, I... 244 00:11:00,920 --> 00:11:02,560 Dad died 12 years ago. 245 00:11:03,560 --> 00:11:05,399 Audrey, that is very insensitive. 246 00:11:05,400 --> 00:11:08,239 I... I'd be two hours, max. If she woke... I could get a pump. 247 00:11:08,240 --> 00:11:09,719 Don't... don't get a pump. 248 00:11:09,720 --> 00:11:12,879 You'll ruin the shape of your beautiful breasts. Don't do that. 249 00:11:12,880 --> 00:11:16,079 Well, I'm not going to use formula, so at some point, I will be pumping. 250 00:11:16,080 --> 00:11:17,999 For goodness' sake, you were raised on formula! 251 00:11:18,000 --> 00:11:20,119 Yeah, because your milk was laced with marijuana. 252 00:11:20,120 --> 00:11:22,160 Yeah, but that's because I had all that back trouble. 253 00:11:23,520 --> 00:11:27,039 And anyway, I can't tonight, I've got a date with Alejandro. 254 00:11:27,383 --> 00:11:29,959 Very sweet, by the way. 255 00:11:29,960 --> 00:11:31,519 Looking forward to meeting you. 256 00:11:31,520 --> 00:11:33,399 Can't wait. 257 00:11:33,400 --> 00:11:35,560 At least one of us is having sex. 258 00:11:37,143 --> 00:11:38,437 _ 259 00:11:38,462 --> 00:11:39,942 Now, come on. 260 00:11:40,760 --> 00:11:42,600 Share some of this tarte au citron. 261 00:11:44,400 --> 00:11:46,759 Yesterday, the census lady asked me when I was due. 262 00:11:46,760 --> 00:11:49,479 Oh, did she? Oh, poor Audrey. 263 00:11:49,480 --> 00:11:51,039 Oh, well. 264 00:11:51,040 --> 00:11:53,679 You know, when I had you, the weight just fell off me. 265 00:11:54,384 --> 00:11:56,400 Mm. 266 00:11:59,880 --> 00:12:01,519 No, no, the client's there. 267 00:12:01,520 --> 00:12:04,039 Why have a meeting in Sydney when you can wine and dine in Melbourne? 268 00:12:04,040 --> 00:12:05,399 Oh, that sucks. 269 00:12:05,400 --> 00:12:08,039 - Who'll babysit? - I'm not sure yet. 270 00:12:08,040 --> 00:12:09,839 It's no biggie. Don't stress. 271 00:12:09,840 --> 00:12:11,960 But it's your birthday. I'm not going to miss it. 272 00:12:19,260 --> 00:12:21,079 - Yes? - Audrey? 273 00:12:21,080 --> 00:12:23,879 Yes, um, I'm your Night Angel. 274 00:12:23,880 --> 00:12:26,039 - Where's Kim? - I am Kim. 275 00:12:26,072 --> 00:12:28,032 Oh! Like Kim Jong-un! 276 00:12:29,400 --> 00:12:31,760 - Kim what? - Come in. 277 00:12:38,445 --> 00:12:41,095 Okay, so I've got my contact number and the number of the restaurant 278 00:12:41,120 --> 00:12:44,639 and, um, her favourite toy, which is just that one there, actually, 279 00:12:44,640 --> 00:12:48,359 and, um, just the hospital number and the local police and our GP. 280 00:12:48,360 --> 00:12:49,679 Any questions? 281 00:12:49,680 --> 00:12:51,399 Uh, yes, do you have the footy channel? 282 00:12:51,400 --> 00:12:53,959 - Don't know. - You do. Got it. 283 00:12:53,960 --> 00:12:55,999 It's a big game on tonight. I'm excited. 284 00:12:56,000 --> 00:12:58,119 Ah, well, um, good luck! 285 00:12:58,120 --> 00:13:00,360 Thank you. We need... we need the win. 286 00:13:01,480 --> 00:13:03,679 Don't hesitate to call if there's anything at all. 287 00:13:03,680 --> 00:13:05,719 - I don't mind. - No worries. Have a good one, Audrey! 288 00:13:05,720 --> 00:13:07,200 Bye. 289 00:13:13,800 --> 00:13:16,079 Come on, sir! Offside! 290 00:13:16,080 --> 00:13:17,560 Fuck! 291 00:13:22,880 --> 00:13:25,439 But is the meat sustainable? 292 00:13:25,440 --> 00:13:28,160 - The meat? Yes. - Oh! Aud, you made it! 293 00:13:30,160 --> 00:13:31,919 - Sorry I'm late. - Can I take your bag, ma'am? 294 00:13:31,920 --> 00:13:34,320 - Uh, no, that's fine. Thanks. - Oh, is that Stevie? 295 00:13:35,840 --> 00:13:37,919 - Uh... - Yeah, it is. 296 00:13:37,920 --> 00:13:40,559 Sorry. She's asleep. You won't even know she's here. 297 00:13:40,560 --> 00:13:42,879 Oh, no! That's good! Sit down. 298 00:13:49,360 --> 00:13:51,839 I'm... I'm so sorry. She'll be asleep soon. 299 00:13:51,840 --> 00:13:54,279 This is fine. This is nothing. It's fine. 300 00:13:54,280 --> 00:13:56,479 Sorry, I shouldn't have done that. 301 00:13:56,480 --> 00:14:00,157 Oh, just pass her over. You haven't even touched your food. 302 00:14:00,288 --> 00:14:02,887 Yeah. But we like it. 303 00:14:02,960 --> 00:14:04,599 Keep her, keep her around. 304 00:14:04,600 --> 00:14:06,839 - How's the mineral water, Pete? - Thanks. 305 00:14:06,840 --> 00:14:08,839 It's fine. It's really good. 306 00:14:08,840 --> 00:14:10,439 Yeah. Do you know what? 307 00:14:10,440 --> 00:14:13,319 There's a really good little room back there I saw. 308 00:14:13,320 --> 00:14:15,919 Wow. So what age do we think it's appropriate 309 00:14:15,920 --> 00:14:17,920 to leave them at home then? 310 00:14:19,160 --> 00:14:20,960 No offence, sweetie. 311 00:14:23,160 --> 00:14:26,160 Wow, you are shovelling that in. 312 00:14:31,640 --> 00:14:34,079 Oh, look, if you can get those changes to me by tomorrow... 313 00:14:34,080 --> 00:14:36,199 - Tonight, even. - ...I think we have a deal. 314 00:14:36,200 --> 00:14:38,119 So you were telling me you have a new baby. 315 00:14:38,120 --> 00:14:39,799 - How old's the baby now? - Oh, a couple of months. 316 00:14:39,800 --> 00:14:40,960 - A couple of months? - Yeah, yeah. 317 00:14:40,961 --> 00:14:43,559 And you're down here in Melbourne? Well played, sir. 318 00:14:43,560 --> 00:14:45,159 Yeah, well, she's... she's doing great. 319 00:14:45,160 --> 00:14:48,479 And you're back in on the old...? 320 00:14:48,480 --> 00:14:50,359 I... I meant the baby. 321 00:14:50,360 --> 00:14:52,879 But, no, Audrey's very good as well. 322 00:14:52,880 --> 00:14:56,519 She's really taken to the motherhood thing, so... 323 00:14:56,520 --> 00:14:58,719 You're not having sex, are ya? 324 00:14:58,720 --> 00:15:01,439 Well, we... we still go okay. 325 00:15:01,440 --> 00:15:02,560 - We just... - Have you had one? 326 00:15:02,561 --> 00:15:03,879 Have you got one off yet? 327 00:15:03,880 --> 00:15:05,679 It's not... 328 00:15:05,680 --> 00:15:09,319 Well, look, it's a... you know, it's a sensitive area, I suppose. 329 00:15:09,320 --> 00:15:10,959 - Well, literally. - In other words, no. 330 00:15:10,960 --> 00:15:13,239 - Just say no. Just admit it. - All right, all right. 331 00:15:13,240 --> 00:15:15,559 No. No, I'm not having sex. 332 00:15:15,560 --> 00:15:17,759 Oh, you poor bastard. 333 00:15:17,760 --> 00:15:19,599 Don't worry, mate, you'll get laid again. 334 00:15:19,600 --> 00:15:20,959 In 2048. 335 00:15:20,960 --> 00:15:22,680 Good, good. 336 00:15:24,000 --> 00:15:26,199 A little something for the birthday girl. 337 00:15:26,280 --> 00:15:28,159 - Wow. - Fancy! 338 00:15:28,160 --> 00:15:29,759 Can we get one more, please? 339 00:15:29,760 --> 00:15:32,319 Uh, I don't think that's a good idea, Aud. 340 00:15:32,320 --> 00:15:34,879 - Five, please. - Four. 341 00:15:34,880 --> 00:15:36,679 - Four. - Five. 342 00:15:36,680 --> 00:15:39,119 - Four's fine. - Five glasses, please. 343 00:15:39,120 --> 00:15:41,279 - Four glasses is fine. - Four's fine. 344 00:15:41,280 --> 00:15:42,959 Pete, I can have one glass of champagne. 345 00:15:42,960 --> 00:15:43,960 Yeah, I'm not saying... 346 00:15:43,961 --> 00:15:46,031 I've got the FeedSafe app, so I'm not going to do anything to the baby. 347 00:15:46,056 --> 00:15:47,488 - I understand that, Aud. - I'm feeding her right now. 348 00:15:47,513 --> 00:15:50,255 I really don't need people telling me what to do tonight, okay? 349 00:15:50,280 --> 00:15:52,199 - Aud! - I know. Of all people! 350 00:15:52,200 --> 00:15:54,840 I just... I just came back from rehab. 351 00:15:56,000 --> 00:15:57,400 Oh, G... 352 00:15:58,600 --> 00:16:00,160 I thought you meant because I was... 353 00:16:01,160 --> 00:16:03,519 Oh, my God! How did I not know that?! 354 00:16:03,520 --> 00:16:05,679 That's... amazing. 355 00:16:05,680 --> 00:16:07,799 Well done! Good on you, Pete. 356 00:16:07,800 --> 00:16:10,919 Oh, my God! Cheers to that, everyone! 357 00:16:10,920 --> 00:16:12,479 - Well done! - Yeah. 358 00:16:12,480 --> 00:16:14,880 - No, cheers, Pete. Well done. - Cheers. 359 00:16:18,840 --> 00:16:21,000 Oh, my God, that's amazing. Oh. 360 00:16:23,000 --> 00:16:25,559 Tell you what I do when I get home, 361 00:16:25,560 --> 00:16:27,359 drive my car into the driveway 362 00:16:27,360 --> 00:16:30,639 and then, do I go in and see my wife and baby? 363 00:16:30,640 --> 00:16:31,760 - Probably? - No. 364 00:16:31,761 --> 00:16:33,679 - Oh. - I stay in the car. 365 00:16:33,680 --> 00:16:34,919 Do you know why? 366 00:16:34,920 --> 00:16:38,039 Because I've got a baby monitor in my glove box 367 00:16:38,040 --> 00:16:40,519 connected to my baby monitor in the nursery. 368 00:16:40,520 --> 00:16:42,679 So I listen in. Is the baby awake, is the baby asleep? 369 00:16:42,680 --> 00:16:45,431 Baby's awake, I stay in the car, do some emails. 370 00:16:45,456 --> 00:16:47,542 - My most productive time. - Right. 371 00:16:47,567 --> 00:16:49,879 Best purchase I ever made. Is she breastfeeding? 372 00:16:49,880 --> 00:16:51,999 - Yep. - Encourage that. 373 00:16:52,000 --> 00:16:54,919 If you do the formula, you're up two, three times yourself. 374 00:16:54,920 --> 00:16:57,199 She goes, "You get up, you get up. I've been doing it all day." 375 00:16:57,200 --> 00:16:58,839 Breastfeeding, who's getting up? 376 00:16:58,840 --> 00:17:00,879 Don't want someone else to get up at 6:00 in the morning! 377 00:17:00,880 --> 00:17:02,399 No, but it's 'cause it's a primal thing. 378 00:17:02,400 --> 00:17:03,480 Sure. 379 00:17:03,481 --> 00:17:05,559 You know, the women are more connected to feeding than the men. 380 00:17:05,560 --> 00:17:06,680 - Do you have kids? - No. 381 00:17:06,681 --> 00:17:09,359 Yeah, but that's it, get the baby monitor situation. 382 00:17:09,360 --> 00:17:11,199 - Keep her breastfeeding. - Baby monitor in the room. 383 00:17:11,200 --> 00:17:14,119 - Sweet, mate. Nothing changes. - Fantastic. Yeah. 384 00:17:14,120 --> 00:17:16,159 Can I get another bottle, please? Let's have one more bottle. 385 00:17:16,160 --> 00:17:18,079 Oh, I'm pretty good, I think. 386 00:17:18,080 --> 00:17:19,879 That's a nice amount of wine for me. 387 00:17:19,880 --> 00:17:21,479 It's Malbec time! 388 00:17:21,480 --> 00:17:23,119 - Oh, yeah, okay, okay. - But I'll cover... 389 00:17:23,120 --> 00:17:24,919 - No, you don't have to. - Hey, guys, she's asleep. 390 00:17:24,920 --> 00:17:26,680 Yay! 391 00:17:27,680 --> 00:17:29,359 So where to, next? 392 00:17:29,360 --> 00:17:31,119 Should we go to Goldies? 393 00:17:31,120 --> 00:17:33,599 Oh, you know what, maybe we should call it a night. I'm kind of tired. 394 00:17:33,600 --> 00:17:36,200 - Me too, actually. - Really? Really? 395 00:17:37,808 --> 00:17:40,807 Okay, well, I might just go and grab a cab then. 396 00:17:40,880 --> 00:17:44,719 I think it might be illegal for cabs to take babies under one. 397 00:17:44,720 --> 00:17:48,759 But there's a... there's a bus stop around the corner. 398 00:17:48,760 --> 00:17:51,799 You could... take a bus, I don't know. 399 00:17:51,800 --> 00:17:53,279 - Is that all right? - Yeah. No, yeah. 400 00:17:53,280 --> 00:17:54,711 - Are you sure? - Yeah. 401 00:17:54,736 --> 00:17:56,495 - Okay. - See ya. 402 00:17:56,520 --> 00:17:58,199 - Bye. - Was great to see you. 403 00:17:58,200 --> 00:17:59,880 - Great to see you guys. - And you, little one. 404 00:18:01,360 --> 00:18:02,639 Happy birthday. 405 00:18:02,640 --> 00:18:03,680 Bye, guys. 406 00:18:03,681 --> 00:18:05,040 - Bye! - See ya! 407 00:18:07,320 --> 00:18:10,799 Far out. Okay. I need a drink. 408 00:18:10,800 --> 00:18:13,279 - Oh, don't. - Don't. Pete, that's not funny. 409 00:18:13,280 --> 00:18:14,760 Yeah. 410 00:19:43,774 --> 00:19:46,894 Aud. Aud... Hey! Sorry. 411 00:19:48,240 --> 00:19:50,959 - Oh. - Um... what are you doing? 412 00:19:50,960 --> 00:19:54,359 And why is Stevie on the ground? 413 00:19:54,360 --> 00:19:57,119 I was just trying to work out why she hates it so much. 414 00:19:57,120 --> 00:19:58,919 - This is actually very comfortable. - Yeah. 415 00:19:58,920 --> 00:20:00,399 It's a good mattress. 416 00:20:00,400 --> 00:20:03,279 I don't know if it's designed to take your weight. 417 00:20:03,280 --> 00:20:05,360 - What?! - Or any adult weight. 418 00:20:06,360 --> 00:20:08,039 Why are you back? 419 00:20:08,040 --> 00:20:11,720 I got the early flight. I... I missed you guys. 420 00:20:12,720 --> 00:20:14,200 Oh, that's nice. 421 00:20:19,240 --> 00:20:20,800 I shouldn't have gone. 422 00:20:22,862 --> 00:20:26,611 Maybe we should pretend it's like 2016 and... 423 00:20:26,840 --> 00:20:28,999 do what we used to do on Saturday morning. 424 00:20:29,000 --> 00:20:31,714 Yes, Huevos Rancheros at Jimmys. 425 00:20:31,800 --> 00:20:35,079 I did eat on the plane, so I don't know if I need another meal. 426 00:20:35,080 --> 00:20:37,880 - No, the other thing. - Oh, yeah, I was kidding. 427 00:20:39,800 --> 00:20:42,119 - Oh, my neck. - You still want to...? 428 00:20:42,120 --> 00:20:43,879 - Yes! - Okay. 429 00:20:43,880 --> 00:20:45,520 Lovely. 430 00:20:47,640 --> 00:20:49,120 Are you sure? 431 00:21:06,080 --> 00:21:08,999 - Oh, ow. It's just my scar. - Do you want to sit up? 432 00:21:09,000 --> 00:21:10,839 - No, I... Yeah. - Yeah? Okay. 433 00:21:10,840 --> 00:21:13,559 - Sit up, sit up, sit up. - Okay. Okay. 434 00:21:13,560 --> 00:21:15,599 - Nope! - Is that haemorrhoids? 435 00:21:15,600 --> 00:21:17,800 - Don't say it. - Oh, sorry. I'm sorry! 436 00:21:21,240 --> 00:21:23,040 - I have missed this. - Mm. 437 00:21:24,600 --> 00:21:26,120 You're all sweaty. 438 00:21:33,400 --> 00:21:34,880 Is that breast milk? 439 00:21:35,880 --> 00:21:37,359 I don't know. Maybe. It doesn't matter. 440 00:21:37,360 --> 00:21:39,160 No, no, it doesn't matter. It's natural, isn't it? 441 00:21:46,960 --> 00:21:49,000 I'll go, okay? I'll go. 442 00:21:54,560 --> 00:21:56,919 Um... what should I do? Should I pick her up? 443 00:21:56,920 --> 00:21:58,559 Yeah, try rocking her. 444 00:21:58,560 --> 00:22:00,960 - What? - Rocking her. 445 00:22:02,520 --> 00:22:04,120 Yeah, she's not stopping. 446 00:22:10,920 --> 00:22:12,440 I think she wants a feed. 447 00:22:14,400 --> 00:22:16,103 Aud? 448 00:22:16,240 --> 00:22:17,905 Hey, Aud! 449 00:22:18,040 --> 00:22:20,159 - How long was I asleep? - I don't know. 450 00:22:20,160 --> 00:22:22,560 - A couple of seconds, maybe. - Well, I'm awake now. 451 00:22:36,400 --> 00:22:38,719 Ah, for fu... 452 00:22:38,720 --> 00:22:40,199 Just... just stick it in. 453 00:22:40,200 --> 00:22:41,999 - What about contraception? - I'm breastfeeding. 454 00:22:42,000 --> 00:22:43,599 - It's fine, I think. - You think? 455 00:22:43,600 --> 00:22:45,559 I mean, you're probably right. 456 00:22:45,560 --> 00:22:47,279 Let me just check, let me just check. 457 00:22:47,280 --> 00:22:49,000 - What, really? - Yes! 458 00:22:50,120 --> 00:22:51,759 - You'll thank me. - You're kidding me. 459 00:22:51,760 --> 00:22:53,279 Hang on, hang on, hang on. 460 00:22:53,280 --> 00:22:54,280 Okay. 461 00:22:55,360 --> 00:22:59,680 Um... hormonal contraception. 462 00:23:00,994 --> 00:23:03,605 Erotic lactation. Okay. 463 00:23:03,640 --> 00:23:06,919 Hey, bingo. Catholics approve. 464 00:23:06,920 --> 00:23:11,119 Oh, wow. Did you know Bec and Tom, they got engaged? 465 00:23:11,120 --> 00:23:12,639 Are you on Facebook? 466 00:23:12,640 --> 00:23:14,359 No, it is just one of those notifications. 467 00:23:14,360 --> 00:23:16,320 Oh, shit. 468 00:23:17,320 --> 00:23:19,840 Harry doesn't like the changes. Fuck! 469 00:23:22,200 --> 00:23:24,640 I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, babe. 470 00:23:32,640 --> 00:23:34,319 Sorry. I just can't concentrate. 471 00:23:34,320 --> 00:23:35,879 You don't have to! 472 00:23:35,880 --> 00:23:39,911 No, but, if I just get on to it now, 473 00:23:39,936 --> 00:23:42,296 I can start now and I can be finished by this afternoon. 474 00:23:42,321 --> 00:23:43,999 - We can still go to... - Finish this! 475 00:23:44,000 --> 00:23:46,159 What's the point in coming home early if you're just gonna...? 476 00:23:46,160 --> 00:23:47,679 Look, it's important. 477 00:23:47,680 --> 00:23:49,319 All right? 478 00:23:49,320 --> 00:23:51,799 I'm under a lot of pressure at the moment, Aud. 479 00:23:51,800 --> 00:23:53,599 I can't fuck it up. 480 00:23:53,600 --> 00:23:55,359 I really cannot fuck it up. 481 00:23:55,360 --> 00:23:58,119 I know I've not been home enough. 482 00:23:58,120 --> 00:24:00,719 And I feel completely useless around Stevie. 483 00:24:03,840 --> 00:24:06,199 I mean, if you express, maybe I could do more of that 484 00:24:06,200 --> 00:24:08,559 but I know breastfeeding is kind of primal, so I don't want to get in... 485 00:24:08,560 --> 00:24:10,640 - What are you talking about? - I don't know. 486 00:24:13,680 --> 00:24:15,760 - I'm sorry. - Mm. 487 00:24:16,240 --> 00:24:19,679 Hey, just... let me do this. 488 00:24:19,680 --> 00:24:21,599 And we'll try again later. 489 00:24:21,600 --> 00:24:23,679 You can have a nap. 490 00:24:23,680 --> 00:24:25,240 - Okay? - Okay. 491 00:24:47,240 --> 00:24:49,159 Oh, well, well, well. Look who it is. 492 00:24:49,160 --> 00:24:51,159 You were down there last time. 493 00:24:51,160 --> 00:24:52,559 Yeah, now I'm here. 494 00:24:52,560 --> 00:24:54,399 Tomorrow I will be there. This whole park's mine. 495 00:24:54,400 --> 00:24:56,079 It is my office, do you get it? 496 00:24:56,080 --> 00:24:58,039 - So... - All right. 497 00:24:58,040 --> 00:25:00,639 Well, I'll go. I'm just going to finish feeding her, all right? 498 00:25:00,640 --> 00:25:02,680 Yeah, righto. You got two minutes. 499 00:25:04,560 --> 00:25:07,159 - Come on, bub. - Oh, nah, hang on, hang on, hang on. 500 00:25:07,160 --> 00:25:08,719 He's not on right. 501 00:25:08,720 --> 00:25:11,239 He's not on right. The spray's probably too full on. 502 00:25:11,240 --> 00:25:14,119 You actually need the dummy half in this situation. 503 00:25:14,120 --> 00:25:15,839 - What? - It's a footy hold. 504 00:25:15,864 --> 00:25:17,759 It's all in the arms. It really works a treat. 505 00:25:17,760 --> 00:25:19,519 Okay, well... 506 00:25:19,520 --> 00:25:20,999 - Okay, off you fuck. - Can you... 507 00:25:21,000 --> 00:25:22,679 Hey, can you just show me what you meant? 508 00:25:22,680 --> 00:25:24,559 Mm-mm. Don't worry about it. Piss off. 509 00:25:24,560 --> 00:25:27,119 - Can you just... just show me the arms. - Hey, nah, fuck off. 510 00:25:27,120 --> 00:25:28,639 Where's your support network, loser? 511 00:25:28,640 --> 00:25:30,919 Just do the footy hold. Just do the arms! 512 00:25:30,920 --> 00:25:32,479 - Fuck off. - Come on! 513 00:25:32,480 --> 00:25:34,440 Parks are for kids, you jerk. 514 00:25:41,840 --> 00:25:45,759 Now, it doesn't matter if their head's in the 100th percentile 515 00:25:45,760 --> 00:25:47,239 and their body's in the fifth, 516 00:25:47,240 --> 00:25:48,719 they grow as they grow. 517 00:25:48,720 --> 00:25:50,199 Hi, there. 518 00:25:50,200 --> 00:25:54,359 Does anyone know the, uh... the dummy hold, 519 00:25:54,360 --> 00:25:56,719 uh, footy hold... sporting reference 520 00:25:56,720 --> 00:25:59,120 to do with holding and breast...? 521 00:26:00,120 --> 00:26:02,759 You probably didn't expect to see me again. 522 00:26:02,760 --> 00:26:05,759 Uh... yeah, I said some things. 523 00:26:05,760 --> 00:26:10,880 Um... sorry if anyone took offence to the... 524 00:26:11,947 --> 00:26:14,868 But, you know, it turns out my support team is not so great. So... 525 00:26:14,960 --> 00:26:19,095 And I took Stevie to a club last week, so I'm... 526 00:26:19,360 --> 00:26:21,563 Shall we give it another try, Audrey? 527 00:26:21,760 --> 00:26:23,046 I guess so. 528 00:26:23,077 --> 00:26:27,665 Ambrose was just talking about managing expectations, so... 529 00:26:34,120 --> 00:26:37,867 Oh, well, I don't know about you guys but I'm finding this all a bit... 530 00:26:38,680 --> 00:26:41,960 um, well, you know, a lot's changed. 531 00:26:43,040 --> 00:26:44,919 A bit more than I expected, actually. 532 00:26:44,920 --> 00:26:48,039 But you all seem so on top of it. 533 00:26:48,040 --> 00:26:52,720 I think she meant managing the expectations of baby's progress. 534 00:26:53,880 --> 00:26:56,199 - Oh. - No, but fair enough. 535 00:26:56,200 --> 00:26:58,440 You and Stevie Nicks had a pretty difficult birth, didn't you? 536 00:26:59,640 --> 00:27:01,519 It's gonna take a while to get over. 537 00:27:01,520 --> 00:27:03,280 Yeah, it wasn't a great start. 538 00:27:05,040 --> 00:27:08,919 Um... yeah, I kept arguing for a natural birth 539 00:27:08,920 --> 00:27:11,000 because I'd read all this stuff and... 540 00:27:12,400 --> 00:27:14,880 and, uh, yeah, we nearly lost her, so... 541 00:27:18,120 --> 00:27:19,840 But you didn't, did you? 542 00:27:22,440 --> 00:27:25,439 So who can demonstrate the football hold for Audrey? 543 00:27:25,440 --> 00:27:27,039 Yeah, I can. No dramas. 544 00:27:27,040 --> 00:27:29,440 Hi. There's a baby outside. 545 00:27:29,920 --> 00:27:31,400 Fuck. 546 00:27:33,137 --> 00:27:38,137 Synced and corrected by kinglouisxx www.addic7ed.com